DJ Lauren Pope can play with my turntables any day

If you’re gonna toss a party, and you need a DJ, you MUST hire Lauren Pope. That is, if you can afford her and if she is available. No reason to hire a broken down lesbo like DJ Samantha Ronson. Who wants to smell her ex’s, Lindsay Lohan’s smokers breath….or perhaps something worse. Is Lauren the better DJ? Who cares! She comes with a lot of tunes and not a lot of clothes so unless you’re throwing a party for the scissor sisters of the WNBA, the choice is as clear as the silicone in Lauren’s tits.

The Real Housewives Of Atlanta: Too Scary For Television

If you haven’t heard from some of your loved ones since around 11pm last night, it’s probably because they are shivering with fear in their closets and chewing on pant bottoms for nourishment after watching the gore fest that was Kim Zolciak’s performance of “Tardy for the Party” on last night’s RHOA reunion (part dose).

You know you live in an “all kinds of wrong” world when the FCC has something to say about Janet Jackson’s nipple, but horrific shit like this ends up on our TV screens. It took me a few seconds to realize that I was not watching yet another alternate ending for Paranormal Activity.

When you make Heidi Montag look like Michael Jackson/Judy Garland/Elvis rolled into one, it’s time to keep your singing voice for shower times only. Actually, scratch that, because bathroom tiles already have a rough deal. Save your singing for the devil.

On a positive note, at least Sheree can cancel her trip to Thailand for that sex age operation, because her dick jumped out of her crotch after this public display of fuckery.

P.S. – Where is the mash-up of “Tardy for the Party” and “Party all the Time” called “Tardy all the Time“?

Valentino Parties With Her Madgesty

Or is it the other way around?

This past Tuesday night Valentino decided to throw a small little party to celebrate the DVD release of his documentary The Last Emperor with some of his friends including Hugh Jackman, Adrien Brody, Brian Grazer, Stephen Daldry, Martha Stewart, Marc Jacobs, Thakoon Panichgul, and Diane von Furstenberg.

Oh and we can’t forget Madonna!

Madge showed up just after 11pm, where her lover Jesus Luz just so happened to be deejaying.

Hmm, wonder how he got that job?

Madonna even made her way to the dance floor and grinded up on Bravo’s Andy Cohen. Everyone eventually followed the Material Girl’s lead including Valentino!

Sounds like some party!

[Image via AP Images.]

Jordin Sparks’ Halloween Costume: Killer Dorothy!

Jordin Sparks leaves Heidi Klum’s Halloween party in Los Angeles looking ghoulish as she holds hands with rumored boyfriend Steph Jones on Saturday (October 31).

The 19-year-old Idol went to the party with Steph, who dressed as a girl with a bad weave, according to his Twitter.

Jordin will be performing at “America’s Biggest Sleepover” this Saturday. The event, which will be broadcast on beinggirl.com, will bring together girls across the country for a night of fun,
sleepover-themed activities.

RSVP for the event at beinggirl.com and Procter & Gamble and Always will donate $1 to Protecting Futures, a program dedicated to helping girls in developing regions stay in school.

It’s battle of the divas…although Mimi might just win this by eating Rihanna

A source tells Page Six that while Rihanna was in attendance at the M2 Ultralounge Halloween party hosted by Mariah Carey, the Barbados native did her best to avoid the busty Mrs. Nick Cannon.

The snitch claims, “It was Mariah’s party, but Rihanna didn’t want to be seen with her. And Mariah was not going over to greet Rihanna. Mariah needed six guards to clear a path to the bathroom so her wings wouldn’t be dislodged.” And Rihanna was also in high-maintenance mode, as it turns out, requiring a security guard to hold up her long tiger’s tail.

However, a rep for Mimi claims that the only reason Mariah never greeted Ri-Ri was because of the crowd of 1,000 party attendees. The rep added, “She heard a rumor that Rihanna was there but she never saw her. She loves Rihanna and of course would have said hello.”

Here’s Rihanna with her scary lioness mane and her pointy, braless boobs leaving her hotel and heading to 4040 Club in NYC to blow off some diva steam.

Christian Siriano is The Little Mermaid’s Ariel

Christian Siriano dresses up as The Little Mermaid’s Ariel as he hosts the “Heroes vs. Villains” Halloween party at Gramercy Park Hotel’s Rose Bar on Saturday (October 31) in New York City.

The 23-year-old fierce fashion designer was accompanied by his boyfriend Brad Walsh, who was Christian’s prince charming, Eric. It apparently was a Disney night as Ursula was at the party also!

The event was also hosted by PR gurus Lauren Auslander (Rosie the Riviter) and Bianca Bianconi (Cleopatra) as well as gallery owner Mazdack Rassi and Rose Bar’s creative director Nur Khan. Also pictured below: Alexa Chung and Agyness Deyn as Wayne and Garth from Wayne’s World.

Just Jared’s costume: Sleeping Beauty’s evil queen, Maleficent, with Diablo the raven! [Makeup: Lindsay Whitt; Scepter: Tori Fath]

Kate Walsh Brings H&M to Hollywood

Kate Walsh shows off some fabulous shoes at the Jimmy Choo for H&M Launch Party in West Hollywood on Monday (November 2).

The 42-year-old Private Practice actress showed off her figure in a crushed velvet blazer with a dramatic cutout and treggings.

Kate and other party guests listened to music by M.I.A. and checked out a sneak preview of what’s to come from Jimmy Choo’s collaboration with affordable retailer H&M.

The new Jimmy Choo collection will hit H&M stores on November 14.

FYI: Kate is wearing Baguette Crystal Earrings by lia sophia.

10+ pictures inside of Kate Walsh supporting Jimmy Choo and H&M…

Kim Zolciak’s Voice Was Tardy For The Party

The Real Housewives of Atlanta threw a Halloween party on Friday night and Kim Zolciak decided to terrorize the audience with a live performance of Tardy For the Party. Obviously, Kim was singing over a track since it’s sort of in tune (SORT OF). If she used her real voice, a pack of wild coyotes would’ve busted through the club thinking one of their young was in danger. Don’t get me wrong, it will still leave your ears wanting to dial 911.

And Kim needs to sit down during her “performances,” because she dances like a bowlegged granny who recently had hip replacement surgery (no offense to bowlegged grannies who recently had hip replacement surgery).

Below are some pictures of the housewives in costume: Kim (as a slutty Alice in Wonderland), Sheree (as Hercules), Kandi (as a disco something-or-another) and Lisa Wu (as Dwight). See more pictures at Talking with Tami.

Jessica Simpson’s Halloween Costume: Moroccan Woman!

Jessica Simpson carries her shoes and walks into a Halloween party on Saturday night (October 31) in Hollywood.

The 29-year-old singer told JustJared.com a bit about her special costume: “I was a bit Moroccan with my one-of-a-kind handmade caftan, jewelry/diamonds from India… mixed with some Jessica Simpson.”

Jessica was in Morocco a few weeks ago to shoot her new reality series, The Price of Beauty.

More pics at X17!

Mariah Carey, Nick Cannon, Ashley Greene And Others Bring Out Their Best For Halloween

When you’re a huge star, sometimes it may seem like every day is Halloween: the elaborate clothes, the constant need to perform, the surreal mix of flash bulbs and eerie silence. That didn’t stop a bevy of musicians and actors from hopping into a costume and heading out to high-profile Halloween parties. Top prize goes to Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon, who showed up to the party at New York’s M2 Ultra Lounge dressed as angels (likely a play on Carey’s recent album title Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel).

Ice-T and his wife Coco took a different tactic when coming up with their couple-centric costume, as they decided to pose as a dominatrix and a gimp at the same party in New York. A few blocks away, the Heroes vs. Villains party at the Gramercy Park Hotel saw appearances from Cat de Luna (who came as Medusa) and Alexa Chung and Agyness Deyn, who partied as Wayne and Garth.

Over in Los Angeles, Heidi Klum hosted her annual Halloween party and arrived to the fete with husband Seal. They were both dressed as ravens, obviously because they appreciate Edgar Allen Poe, Joe Flacco and Raven-Symoné. Guests there included “Dollhouse” star Eliza Dushku and boyfriend Rick Fox, who appeared as zombie versions of Bonnie and Clyde. And Gavin Rossdale and Gwen Stefani didn’t commit themselves to a party, preferring instead to take their kids trick-or-treating. The two kids were dressed as dinosaurs, while Stefani donned a cowgirl costume and Rossdale went as himself circa 1998.

Click here for the best of celebrity Halloween costumes, including Mariah Carey, Ashley Greene and Audrina Patridge!

Who had the best celebrity Halloween costume? Leave your thoughts in the comments!

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